Friday, November 03, 2006

Ad-nauseum

To borrow from The Daily Show... (^).

So we've all been plagued by those ads featuring some old dude's shoes slowly stomping across some dusty floor while a voice tells us that black telephones = the man and the man is bad, and black telephones are a sign of our repression by the evil telecommunication companies or something like that.

The only problem with the ad is I can't really tell which side of the argument its on, and what it says doesn't quite make sense to me.

For the first time, I saw today an ad (I guess) from those evil telecommunication companies against (they say) evil Silicon Valley companies.
Like it's antagonist, this new ad doesn't really make sense as you watch it, and it kind of makes you wonder if this isn't some big joke.

The major difference is the ad rather blatantly directs its anger toward Google. It begins with "Do you feel 'Google'eyed about new telecommunications legislation?"

It then tries to tell you that by keeping the Internet free, it will cost YOU more. PITY the THOUGHT. Freedom costs something sometimes, and I would much rather pay a little more and get all my Web pages to load at comparable rates.

But I digress. Then the ad puts up a bunch of text in Google's signature font and signature basic colors.

Then it mentions "those evil silicon valley companies" and how they want to charge you for EVERYTHING. Oh no!

But wait, I find myself pondering, aren't all of Google's plethora of services free?? Why yes, Brendan, the voice inside my head affirms, they are free.

So when is Google trying to charge me money for what?
Their e-mail service? Nope. Free.
Must be the maps and directions. Oh wait, free.
Hey well what about the satellite images on those maps? Free.
Documents and Spreadsheets? Free.
News service? Free.
Well, they just bought YouTube, maybe that's it. Nope, YouTube is free, too.
The new application for checking your e-mail via mobile phone/PDA? Free.
Searching images is free, searching the Web is free. Hey, nowadays you can even create a custom search tailored to your specific interest and plop it on your site. But that doesn't cost money, either.

So with which bill, exactly, is Google trying to foot me?

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